America - Learn to Speak English

The English language, used properly is a joy. There is an incredible array of words, enabling a conveyance of  many of the subtleties, the nuances of human emotion. With English, we can plumb the depths of despair and climb the heights of love. We can explore our relation to our fellow creatures and give voice to their feelings. We can attempt to relate our lonely outpost here in the middle of this average galaxy swirling in the midst of the infinite. We can contemplate our Creator and try, usually with little effect, but still with nobility, to explain our relationship to the Divine.

I am not stuffy. I love slang and the diversity of dialect, but, in appropriate situations. I am not prudish. I have been known, on occasion, to let loose with amazingly colorful bursts of profanity, but, when overused, those expletives lose their punch and just become boring and tasteless. A little bit goes a long way.

Part of the problem is sheer sloth. We have grown lazy. However, part has come from the academic world. The post-modern philosophers have promoted the idea that what is written or spoken only has whatever meaning the reader or listener gives to those words. The author or speakers intent does not even matter,  just what you think. Thus, we may as well eliminate dictionaries. If I want to call the sky green, well, okay. If I write the word 'alligator' and you envision a squirrel, well, that is your interpretation.

This is dangerous on two levels. First, it puts an end to coherent communication. The Tower of Babel story explains why we have different languages. If we follow this line of thought, each individual human will have his own unique language and we will live in a world of pure solipsism. Certainly, we all have different associations we attach to words. Love may conjure up one image to me and another to a toddler, but at least their would be a basic agreement that the word refers to a positive  emotion.

The other problem is extremely dangerous. Do they even still teach George Orwell's 1984 anymore in schools? If not, educators should be chastised, if not actually tarred and feathered. Those who have read it will remember that in the book, Big Brother decided what words meant and preached that Love=Hate and Peace=War. If a society allows its basic language to be thus manipulated then we may as well all be lobotomized.

So please, learn the wonderful English language. How? Easy, read. If you see words you don't know, get a dictionary. Buy a real dictionary, they are cheap and much easier to use than an on-line version. Push yourself a little and try some of the classic writers. They told fine tales and really are not that hard to read. And please, try to speak the language. The occasional use of 'bro' and 'dude' is okay, but when used all the time they grow amazingly boring. If you try real hard, I will bet that you can use actual names of people and do so without every other word being obscene.

American Language

American English is a wonderfully expressive language, very colorful, and cursing, in the Land, used to be something of an art form. Let me first say that I have nothing against profanity when used appropriately, which usually means sparingly.

I have known many a person who could let out long strings of hilariously profane words when the situation was appropriate. I myself was once something of a master at this. When I hammered my finger to the edge of a PVC pipe with a 5 pound hammer I let fly with a string that should have been recorded to preserve its colorful brilliance, but, I did not do so at every occasion. When used rarely, such language is effective. Overuse makes it boring.

I certainly can't speak for girls, but when I was young, cursing was something of a right of passage. The first time you let out with a swear word around your Dad and he let it pass without comment, you knew you were growing up. Even more important was the first time you were allowed to continue sitting around the grown up men when the jokes got racy (do folks still even use that word?). Now,7 year olds use language in public that would have gotten me slapped and sent too my room and they probably know more about sex than I did when I was 14, and parents seem alright with this. I have ambivalent feelings. It is not a good idea to keep kids in the dark about such matters and hearing a 7 year old let loose with a curse word should not be cause for panic, but I still think that kids should be eased into adulthood. Now, it seems that they are exposed to everything at the earliest possible age and while I am not sure that this is harmful, I do believe that it costs kids in that they cannot pass through the stages of growth in an orderly manner. Then again, I don't have kids, so maybe I am just being stuffy and overly conservative.

But I do know that it is too easy to slip into frequent obscenity and when that language is over used it is boring and it robs the language of some of its beauty. English is a fine, expressive language and to use only a few words over and over is a shame. By the way, this goes for other over used words as well. Please learn to use words other than 'awesome,' 'dude,' 'bro,' and 'bitch.' Read some and learn how the language should be used. Parents, your kids learn how to speak from you more that friends or school so, tone down the cursing, use a variety of word, don't always speak in slang, and let your kids see you read every now and then. You don't have to be prudish and you don't have to sound like an English professor, but you would do your children a great favor by showing them how to use decent, expressive, and pleasant language. At the same time, if you whack your hand with a hammer and let the curses fly, you're excused.